Construction and Destruction

The Vatican has recently opened up some of its archives.  One of the revelations was a claim by Michelangelo for some painting services for which the Pope stiffed him.  The Vatican has not told us the whole story but with further digging I have discovered that Michelangelo actually registered a construction lien against the lands and premises of the Vatican as security for payment.  It seems he allegedly told Pope Julius II that he would have the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel painted in 7 days.  After 5 years His Holiness said enough is enough.  He ejected Michelangelo from the Chapel and he brought in Mario and Alfredo’s Painting and Drywall who finished the job in 3 days by applying 2 coats of semi gloss. 

Michelangelo would have won the action but for the fact that his lawyer failed to register the lien within 45 days from the day that his work was substantially completed.   He tried sneaking back into the Sistine Chapel get the 45 days to start running again by adding a couple of naked cherubs but an alert archbishop realized the ploy and yanked Michelangelo off the ceiling.  Michelangelo never forgave the Pope and got his revenge through his sculptures. To this day most folks believe that tall anatomically correct man stationed in that museum in Florence is supposed to be David.

We do not know whether Michelangelo ever went after the lawyer for negligence.   

Speaking of survivors, my hat goes off to Tsutomu Yamaguchi who died this week at age 93.  Fortunately he survived the atomic bomb dropped on Hiroshima where he was on business.  Unfortunately he went right home to Nagasaki.  You guessed it; boom again.  Yamaguchi said he thought the big mushroom had followed him home.

Yet he lived a healthy life all these years.  Imagine him as a plaintiff.  His lawyer would have a hard time scoring points:

“Members of the jury. My client was 3 kilometres from ground zero in Hiroshima. He was severely traumatized. After the atomic bomb went off, it took Tsutomu 35 minutes to find his hat.  And then when back in his hometown of Nagasaki, he was having tea when the second A-bomb landed just outside his backyard.  At this point, he was livid. He ran out shaking his fists at the American bomber flying overhead.”

But he was certainly a symbol of good luck.  In this day and age wouldn’t we all want to have had him as a passenger on our flights!  Security wouldn’t even want to check his luggage.