Legal Humour News - July 14, 2008

Hi and welcome to this week's newsletter. If it's in the news and it's got a legal slant, we'll do a blawg on it.

British barristers have their wigs in a knot and having the time of their lives doing it at the Max Mosley trial in London, and arguing over sadomasochism.  Read Marcel’s blawg about this event in Das Boot.

And speaking of Englishmen, July 11 has just marked the anniversary of the publication of Charles Dickens’ “Tale of Two Cities”.  Enjoy Marcel’s take on this classic with A Far, Far Better Tale.
 
All of this is in addition to a selection of weird legal news happenings from around the world.

Odd or Amusing Legal Stories from the Past Week:

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1 - See You In Court!

Man Sues Tenn. Church Over Spiritual Fall
A man in Knoxville, Tenn., says he was so consumed by the spirit of God that he fell and hit his head while worshipping. Now he wants Lakewind Church to pay US$2.5 million for medical bills, lost income, and pain and suffering. He says he was asking God to have "a real experience" while praying.
http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/WeirdNews/2008/07/10/6121366-ap.html

Rasta Smoker Wins Appeal Against Pot Conviction In Italy
If you're a Rastafarian in Italy, you might be able to possess more marijuana than the law allows everyone else. Italy's highest criminal court has ruled that the fact Rastafarians consider marijuana use a religious sacrament should be taken into account if they are tried on trafficking charges. Smoking pot in Italy is not a crime, but being caught with amounts considered too large for personal use can bring charges of trafficking. The court threw out the drug trafficking conviction of a 44-year-old Italian Rastafarian.
http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/WeirdNews/2008/07/11/6130506-ap.html

Italian Wins Damages Over Gay Driving Test Retake
An Italian court has ruled the government must pay 100,000 euros (79,981 pounds) in damages to a man who was told to retake a driving test because he was homosexual. When 26 year-old Danilo told doctors he was gay at his medical examination for military service, they passed the information to the transport ministry, who told him he must repeat his driving test or have his licence withdrawn due to his "sexual identity disturbance."
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20080712/od_uk_nm/oukoe_uk_italy_gay_discrimination

$14,000 For Broken Ankle, Stiletto
A British court has ordered a store to pay $14,400 to a woman who broke her ankle and needed surgery because her stiletto heel snapped off. A Manchester court ordered the Dolcis store to pay the plaintiff, whose ankle still swells painfully three years after her operation.
http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/WeirdNews/2008/07/09/6109896-ap.html

Judge Tells Verbose Lawyer To Make It Snappy
A federal judge in Tacoma has told a lawyer he needs to make it snappy. Judge Ronald Leighton balked at a 465-page lawsuit that made its way onto his desk. He invoked a rarely used rule that requires a “short and plain statement” of allegations. The judge issued his order in a limerick: “Plaintiff has a great deal to say, But it seems he skipped Rule 8(a). His Complaint is too long, Which renders it wrong, Please rewrite and refile today.”
http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/WeirdNews/2008/07/07/6093046-ap.html

UK Court: Pringles Are Potato-Light, Tax-Free
Britain's High Court has ruled that Pringles are not a potato snack, and thus are not subject to value-added tax. The ruling by Justice Nicholas Warren is expected to save millions for the manufacturer, Procter and Gamble Co.
http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/WeirdNews/2008/07/04/6067281-ap.html

Romanian Doctor Accidentally Severed Man's Penis
A court has ordered a Romanian surgeon to pay $795,000 in compensation to a patient whose penis he accidentally severed during an operation. The victim's lawyer said you don't have to be an expert to realize that the 33-year-old victim isn't in a good state of mind.
http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/WeirdNews/2008/07/04/6064786-ap.html

Swiss Court Rules On Noisy Chicken
A Swiss court has ordered that a chicken be locked up in a soundproof box every night so its neighbours can get a good night's sleep.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/switzerlandanimalsoffbeat

2 - Crime and Punishment

Alleged Fla. Sausage Assault Brings Battery Charge
A man was charged with battery after he hit his mother in the head with a three-pound package of Polish sausage.
http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/WeirdNews/2008/07/02/6042401-ap.html

Stripper Arrested For Subway Pole Dances
A stripper who danced on the poles of Santiago subway trains to challenge the prudishness of Chilean society was arrested during one of her lightning performances. The professional pole dancer worked quickly all week to avoid arrest, getting on at one station, finding a subway car with no children on it and stripping in time to exit at the next station.
http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUSN1138246820080711

Court Convicts Man Who Says He Can Raise Dead
A Moscow court has convicted a man of fraud for preying on people mourning loved ones by saying he could resurrect the dead.
http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUSL0714742020080708

Woman Overpowers Thief With Tea And Sympathy
A Japanese woman and her six-month-old baby escaped unhurt from a knife-wielding thief after the mother calmed him down with a cup of tea and a chat.
http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUSN0818516620080708 

3 - Politics, Law, and Governance

Island Mulls Nationwide Ban On Tobacco
Health officials want to make the tiny South Pacific island of Niue the first country in the world to be fully smoke-free by banning tobacco. A bill proposing to ban smoking and the sale of tobacco in all public areas and private homes in Niue - pronounced NEE-oo-ay - has been drafted and presented to legislators.
http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/WeirdNews/2008/07/08/6099136-ap.html

You Want Cheese Curds With That?
Canada's U.S. embassy has apologized for a party invitation that featured a prominent figure in Canadian history brandishing a large plate of French fries covered in cheese curds and gravy. The dish -- known as poutine -- is often looked down on as a kind of staple fast food in the French-speaking province of Quebec, where some nationalists are quick to take offence at what they see as unfair treatment by the country's English-speaking majority. The e-mailed invitation to a Canada Day party on July 1 showed Samuel de Champlain, the French explorer who founded Quebec City on July 3, 1608, holding a plate of poutine.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/odd_poutine_dc

4 - And Now for Something Completely Different

Brothel Offers Customers Gas Rebate
A Nevada brothel is trying to stimulate business by offering free gasoline. Clients of the Shady Lady Ranch will get a $50 gas voucher if they fork out $300 -- worth about one hour's worth of services -- at the brothel in Beatty, Nevada, 130 miles northwest of Las Vegas.
http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUSN0930942720080709

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